I suppose it is a part of the human condition - always seeking approval and acceptance...the need to please. I wonder how many of us would make different the choices if our actions were based on what we felt was right for us, instead of what we think will please someone else.

Something recently happened that opened my eyes to how many of the decisions I make, and how much of my behavior, is based on what others expect of me and what they might think of me, rather than what I think or feel is right.

People who know me probably see me as a pretty confident person who is not afraid to voice my opinion, or to stand up for myself or a cause I believe in. Yet when faced with disapproval I realize that I put too much empahsis on someone else's judgement, rather than my own.This recent experience was very eye-opening, and helped me to recognize a pattern in my life, as well as acknowledge how much time and energy I expend on doing things because I am looking for validation from others. On a logical level I know I can never please everyone and yet the approval of other people seems to have a way of countering that logic.

As Oprah always says, "when you know better, you do better" - and so now that I am aware of how much emphasis I put on pleasing other people, my goal is to pay closer attention to what brings me happiness and pleasure - and to stop living my life to other's expectations, and to start living up to my own. Because at the end of the day there is only one person I answer to, and that is me!!